[Truthfully, seeing Pokey's head instead of inferring what it looked like had...made Mettaton's resolve stiffen, and if he had a stomach, it would probably be churning.
Rotting flesh is...not something he's terribly fond of seeing, he realizes.]
I once had to see a small pile of my corpses before. Seeing the head isn't much. I was more worried about Asriel seeing it than anything.
Not really. So he's kind of a jackass. So what. If the guy actually hurt me I'd understand it more, but he's just being a dick. There's no point killing him over it.
Yeah I did and when I did I fucked things up for everyone.
Will you please listen to me. What are you going to do when this just escalates into more and more violence. Are you just going to kill everyone? Do you think some of the people are just going to stop at targeting you? The freak with the head actually might because I don't know if he really gives a damn, but there is bound to be someone in this town willing to get that mean.
I wish I had stopped myself from doing something stupid. Do you really not get that? Nothing good is going to come from just doing whatever you want here.
I'm not saying you can't be angry. It's fine you're angry. You don't need to grovel. You can be angry all you want.
What I'm saying is we can't just keep destroying each other, let alone when someone isn't even threatening you. Yeah. He's an asshole. It's not great that he's an asshole but killing him isn't going to bring about anything good.
You don't need to apologize to me. You really don't.
Look. I've kind of spent my entire time here overreacting and overreacting and defending myself when there was nothing trying to get me. And then I fucked up bad enough there should have been, and people are still defending me. I dunno. I'm tired of it.
Let people say what they want. Do whatever they want with my corpse or whatever if it's just that funny to them. It's not that I think I deserve it.
It's that I'm tired of defending myself all the time. Fuck it. I pretty much want to just keep walking and helping where I can at this point since they're willing to still let me.
I don't want to see you just keep getting caught up in this swarm of violence because of this or because you think you have to.
I WISH I COULD SAY THAT I CAN KEEP TRYING TO IMPROVE. THAT THINGS WILL GET BETTER OVER TIME. BUT I THINK I HAVE PROVEN TIME AND TIME AGAIN THAT SUCH THINGS ARE NOT ACHIEVABLE FOR ME.
[Mettaton very strongly considers telling Pokey what else he'd said on that board. That he wanted to die. And that he wished he could faciitate it. To Asriel, no less.
But he doesn't have the courage to say it with his face attached to it.]
I think you're wrong. I dunno. Maybe a part of it is who you are. I'm not going to tell you who you are and hey. I dunno. Maybe I'm overstepping bounds by even talking to you about this.
I can't say things will get better over time. All we can do is try.
Look if you need to talk about anything at all, I'm here. Alright?
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POKEY LOOK. I'M GOING TO KILL HIM. THAT'S NOT GOING TO CHANGE.
I'M SORRY THAT IT'S NOT GOING TO TURN OUT ANY DIFFERENTLY, BUT I HAVE GONE PAST THE POINT OF CARING. I WILL NOT CONTINUE TO BE ANTAGONIZED!
no subject
WHY AREN'T YOU MORE UPSET???
DOESN'T IT BOTHER YOU?
[Truthfully, seeing Pokey's head instead of inferring what it looked like had...made Mettaton's resolve stiffen, and if he had a stomach, it would probably be churning.
Rotting flesh is...not something he's terribly fond of seeing, he realizes.]
no subject
Not really. So he's kind of a jackass. So what. If the guy actually hurt me I'd understand it more, but he's just being a dick. There's no point killing him over it.
no subject
THIS.
I WANT THIS. IT'S ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS I WANT. JUST LET ME HAVE IT.
no subject
Will you please listen to me. What are you going to do when this just escalates into more and more violence. Are you just going to kill everyone? Do you think some of the people are just going to stop at targeting you? The freak with the head actually might because I don't know if he really gives a damn, but there is bound to be someone in this town willing to get that mean.
What you do isn't going to just affect you here.
no subject
BUT I GUESS THE ONLY PART I'M SEEING HERE IS THAT I'M THE ONLY ONE DISALLOWED TO DO ANYTHING STUPID.
DID IT ONCE, BRANDED FOR MY ENTIRE TENURE HERE, SO NOW WHAT? NOW I JUST GROVEL FOR THE REST OF MY TIME HERE BECAUSE THAT IS THE ONLY THING I CAN DO.
I CAN'T BE ANGRY.
no subject
I'm not saying you can't be angry. It's fine you're angry. You don't need to grovel. You can be angry all you want.
What I'm saying is we can't just keep destroying each other, let alone when someone isn't even threatening you. Yeah. He's an asshole. It's not great that he's an asshole but killing him isn't going to bring about anything good.
no subject
I TRULY AM SORRY.
no subject
Look. I've kind of spent my entire time here overreacting and overreacting and defending myself when there was nothing trying to get me. And then I fucked up bad enough there should have been, and people are still defending me. I dunno. I'm tired of it.
Let people say what they want. Do whatever they want with my corpse or whatever if it's just that funny to them. It's not that I think I deserve it.
It's that I'm tired of defending myself all the time. Fuck it. I pretty much want to just keep walking and helping where I can at this point since they're willing to still let me.
I don't want to see you just keep getting caught up in this swarm of violence because of this or because you think you have to.
no subject
IT'S JUST WHO I AM, YOU KNOW.
I WISH I COULD SAY THAT I CAN KEEP TRYING TO IMPROVE. THAT THINGS WILL GET BETTER OVER TIME. BUT I THINK I HAVE PROVEN TIME AND TIME AGAIN THAT SUCH THINGS ARE NOT ACHIEVABLE FOR ME.
[Mettaton very strongly considers telling Pokey what else he'd said on that board. That he wanted to die. And that he wished he could faciitate it. To Asriel, no less.
But he doesn't have the courage to say it with his face attached to it.]
I'M TIRED. I THINK I'M GOING TO LAY DOWN.
no subject
I can't say things will get better over time. All we can do is try.
Look if you need to talk about anything at all, I'm here. Alright?
no subject
BUT YOU CAN TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT. WE ARE FRIENDS, RIGHT?
[He probably presumes too much, of course. Pokey is Asriel's friend.]
no subject
You're not getting rid of me.
Case that isn't clear enough? Yeah. We're friends Mettaton. I promise.